23 Secrets Husbands And Wives Keep From Each Other
As husband and wife, there is nothing that you will not share about each other. However, you will keep secrets from each other if it meant protecting your relationship. It is not because of any issue with your marriage, but you are willing to bear a few secrets to keep it from crumbling, or hurting your spouse. Some secrets are harmless, more of an annoyance. Other secrets can dissolve a marriage, hence you might find some secrets that spouses keep from each other.
Here are 23 typical secrets that husbands and wives keep from each other. This is just a general list, as people have different thresholds and different view of betrayal. Some research states that you keep secrets because you are expected to be faithful to your partner’s wishes. If you are a wife who is keeping a secret from your spouse, rest assured that you are not alone.
1. Secret bank account
If you like to save while your spouse prefers to spend, chances are you will be creating a secret savings account. You want to be assured that you will have something for the rainy day, even if it means not telling your spouse about it.
2. Secret credit card debt
You cannot help yourself with shopping, but your spouse is strict on family finances. To avoid scrutiny and judgemental looks, you applied for a credit card on your name. Your spouse might still find out, when you are unable to pay off the debt, and debt collectors come knocking.
3. Gambling habit
Even keeping a secret from your spouse is a gamble by itself. You might try to hide this habit from your spouse. It is easier to gamble nowadays, many gambling websites are available. So you can be home risking hard earned money away. If it does get out of hand, your partner will find out soon enough.
4. Bad past behavior
Been to jail for stealing or a fight? It is understandable if you do not want to revisit the past. Keeping it a secret it not such a big deal, unless you are still stealing and fighting. While not everyone has a past they rather forget, you can be forgiven for omitting this detail of your past.
5. Aborting an unwanted pregnancy
If your husband wants a baby, yet you are not ready, this might be the secret you take to your grave. It is not that you do not want a child, you are not prepared for commitment or giving up your dream. Aborting the pregnancy may ruin your relationship, so you are keeping it a secret.
6. That time you had STD
Most people will never tell their partners about the time they had sexually transmitted disease, as long as it is gone. Like bad past behaviors, it will remain forgotten, until it rears its ugly head again. STD like syphilis can manifest again when immune system is low, then there will be explaining.
7. Drinks with Ex
You went to have a drink with your ex, it was to catch up as friends. But you will never tell your spouse that, as it might be taken out of context. You want to avoid an argument, so you treat it as a drink with a friend.
8. Spending Free Time
How you spend your free time used to be your own business, there is no reason that this would change now. But you realize that how you utilize your time away might cause friction, so you opt to stay quiet about it.
9. Forgotten things
You have forgotten that you have made plans weeks before, and when you remember, you use the last minute invite as an excuse. You will also keep a secret from your spouse about how you have forgotten to buy things, and use no stock as a reason why you did not buy it. Otherwise the spouse might think that you have dementia.
10. Sexual dissatisfaction
To avoid any arguments and fights, many husbands and wives will keep their sexual dissatisfaction a secret.
11. Masturbating frequency
Having kept their sexual unhappiness a secret, the spouse will never know how often you masturbate. Either you are ashamed of your sexual needs, or you lack fulfillment that you need to take matters to your own hands.
12. Favorite meal not cooked from scratch
Your spouse loves that cake or meal that you serve up, thinking that you have made it with love from scratch. The truth is far away from it, but you are basking in all the glory, it seems a shame to admit that it came from somewhere else.
You had an affair while you are married to your spouse. It was just a short stint, when you drifted apart because of the newborns. Now that your relationship is stronger than ever, you will never tell about the third wheel.
14. Someone flirted with you
You feel flattered and happy when someone else aside from your spouse gave you the look and wink. Being married does not mean that you do not want to feel desired, being flirted upon gives you a boost in morale. Your partner should not now, because you want to avoid a fight.
15. Past relationships
How many past relationships is a piece of information that should stay in the past. While some partners will accept that, other might wield it as a weapon, and accuse you of being potentially unfaithful. You do not mean to keep this a secret from your spouse, but you want a peaceful marriage.
If you desire something that your spouse will frown upon, then you might either keep it to yourself, or hide your desire someplace where your partner cannot find. However, if your partner knows you well enough, this secret from your wife will be out of the bag quickly.
17. Alone time
Everyone needs some alone time, so you sometimes hide in the car or pretending to stay in the office for extra work. Your spouse does not have to know that you stole some time alone, to keep yourself sane.
18. Small procedures
Botox, tummy tucks and other small procedures that need little recovery time is a best kept secret in relationships to looking youthful. You do not want your spouse to know that you have been cheating, let your partner think that you age gracefully.
Most victims of abuse tend to keep this past a secret from their spouse. There are many reasons for that, but once you open up to your partner about the pain, it might get better. It is difficult to be honest about being abused, however it is worth it for a stronger relationship.
20. Time in hospital
You had spent some time in the hospital following an incident, it could be a broken limb or a bout of depression. Most people will keep it a secret from their spouse, because they may appear weak or imperfect. Unless there is a heroic reason for being in hospital, chances are it will remain a secret.
21. Annoying in-laws
Complaining about your in-laws usually will lead to an argument, which is why keeping a secret from your husband about how you hate them is a wise decision. It does not mean that you will not be venting to your best friend.
22. Breaking home rules
You will never tell your spouse that you are re-watching a movie or series, because you have made a pact to do it together, but you had watched it days before. Or you did not tell your spouse that you had already eaten, so you ate a second helping of dinner. Either way, this secret you should keep to avoid a war.
23. Past marriage
Unless you have kids from past marriage, chances are you will not be telling your spouse that you have walked down the aisle before. Like past relationships, it does not seem necessary to indulge this information.