10 Marriage-Saving Lessons from Couples Who Didn’t Make It
It is not easy to take any advice from someone else. But if you feel like your marriage is on the rocks you might want to see what could be wrong. If you just want to learn how not to make the mistakes of others, these 10 marriage-saving lessons from couples who didn’t make it can really help you.
Don’t take things too personally
In many cases marriage seems to fail for no apparent reason. There might be just little things that annoy both partners until they can´t handle being with each other anymore. If your partner has a habit that really gets on your nerves, remember, it is just who they are. Try to accept these little things and focus on the bigger picture.
When a couple has been married for a while, they know a lot of things about each other. This includes the small or big things that can really hurt them. If you are angry and fighting with your partner, avoid using your knowledge of their weaknesses. You might hurt your partners feelings so badly that they will start to resent you.
Admit it when your are wrong
Everyone gets in an argument from time to time. But what people from failed marriages remind, is to admit when you are wrong. Setting aside your ego for the benefit of relationship will only award you. Also sometimes it is necessary to agree with your partner, if they really need it.
Appreciate your partner
If you think your partner is great, tell them that. Always keep reminding them how much you appreciate things that they are doing for you and your family. Many divorced couples admit that they didn’t even realize how much their partners value them, until they got divorced.
Don’t forget about yourself
While you need to appreciate your partner, don’t forget about your needs. If you are trying to make your life together perfect, you might end up exhausted and unsatisfied. From time to time take a break and treat yourself with something that you want and need. Being well rested and happy can only benefit your relationship.
Don’t hide your feelings
Being together with another person is never an easy task. For many couples the reason for break-up can be simply some minor disagreement that has grown into a big problem. If you and your partner have some things you have completely different opinions about, don’t try to hide them. Be honest and accept that you are different.
Be supportive of each other´s dreams
Divorced people admit, that one of the reasons for their marriage to end was dismissing attitude from their partners. If your partner has some big dreams, try to support them. Even if you think what they desire is impossible, you never know what is going to happen. You never know, maybe your support is exactly what will help your partner succeed.
Don’t lose yourself in the relationship
When people first start dating, they usually show only their best selves. With time you will reveal more and more about your partner.
But many relationships suffer because partners try to keep up with an image that other people expect of them. Being someone you are not in long term will damage your relationship. Forget what other people think and simply be yourself.
It sounds very simple- just be happy. If you feel unhappy in your relationship, the problem could be you. Look at where you are in your life and see what is bothering you. Making choices that make you happy can only benefit your relationship. Don’t expect your partner to fix all of your problems. If the problem was you, divorce will not make you feel better.
A lot of couples admit that the reason for their divorce was that one of the partners simply stopped trying to grow. Even if you have achieved all your life goals, but your partner is still headed that way, keep up with them. Find common goals and build dreams together to keep your relationship going.