Am I Cynical About Love and Dating?
Many people at a point in time, become cynical about relationships due to its ups and down. Relationship and its troubles are very different from the Cinderella love you watch in romantic movies. You will be highly disappointed if you take such a mindset into a new relationship, as it can never be rosy. Love is extraordinary, as someone you will die for today can become an enemy tomorrow. It can go to this extent. Thus, here are some ways to know if you are becoming cynical in love.
So, many others also become brokenhearted and give up on the relationship. These groups of persons gradually become cynical about love and don’t believe in it again. Is this ringing a bell? Do you have such qualities?
1. You are Content with Your Single Life
So, people cynical about relationships mostly embrace their single status and make no move to start a new relationship. Instead of opening up for a new relationship, they rather become uninterested in anything related to dating. Instead, you will be busily judging other people’s relationship and give reasons why it will fail one day just as theirs did. The fact that yours failed does not mean every other relationship will fail.
2. You Become Distrustful
Oh yes, your ex-partner did promise you heaven and earth, but at the end failed by dumping you. They did not just fail but tore your heart apart. This will certainly make you distrust other people and forbid yourself from entering into another relationship.
Even if you can mend your heart and start a new one, you become conservative in the relationship and do not trust your partner. This is mainly because of your personal experience or a breakup you have witnessed. This surely proves that you have become a love cynic.
3. You see others Relationship as an Illusion
Once bitten, twice shy. So, you have once had a beautiful relationship full of hope, but it ended in tatters. This makes you cynical about other people’s relationship. It might also end in pain, and it’s just a matter of time. You always feel such relationship is just an illusion or a fake. You begin to wonder whether there is any real and happy relationship out there and conclude that all couples are probably acting outside.
4. You Will Even Hate Romantic Movies
As a romantic movie lover, you formed your judgment of an ideal relationship on what you see on the screens. Yeah, you believed in fairy tale love, and that made you disappointed in the previous relationship. It is a grave mistake to juxtapose your relationship to what happens in a movie. Romeo and Juliet only happen in books and films. Of course, it worked for the character in the movie, but don’t expect the same. Thus, this huge disappointment may cause you to give up on romantic movies. This shows how cynical you have become about love.
5. Long-term Relationship will not be a Priority
But, for a cynic, there is nothing like a serious relationship anymore. Rather, they would want to flirt or keep a short-term relationship than a longer one. Yes, to satisfy your sexual and emotional needs, you may choose to date, but it will always be for a short-term. Just because you are cynical, you will see long-term relationships as a burden and not achievable. Why won’t you think so when almost all your relationships ended badly. This will create a perception that long-term relationships are impossible.
6. Marriage Doesn’t Cross Your Mind
Love cynics can give up on everything concerning love, including marriage. So while many see marriage as a blessing and a lifetime fulfillment, cynics become indifferent. To you, marriage is just one of those fantasies, which make people lose their freedom and privacy of their partners. You always feel people are unhappy in their marriages. You look for escape plans to ease that burden of a union. Alternatively, you just went to make babies or please your parents.
7. You always expect other Relationships to Fail
Cynics always mark time and give a lifeline to other people’s relationship. They become a prophet of doom, always predicting the end time. Instead of being happy for your friend in finding a new partner, you rather become skeptical and wonder how long that relationship will last.
Yes, your friend and his partner may be doing very well, love each other, have dated for a while and are making plans for the future. However, you will see it as one of the usual things, and it is just a matter of time for it to fail. You will start comparing them to others who had great relationships, but at the end were broken hearted.
8. You Never Want to Discuss Any Relationship
Cynics would rather prefer to discuss new movies than to talk about relationship issues. Talking about relationships may seem like a taboo to you. You always become frustrated when your friends start talking about their partners. Yes, some friends can be very annoying, and they will continue to deafen your ears with how well their relationships are working. Your cynicism will then come to play, as you will always try to change the topic. You would rather prefer they talk about themselves instead of talking about their partners.
9. Cynical about Love means I Told You So
You always feel vindicated when your friend’s relationships fail. Probably, they did not heed your advice when they started the relationship, and the breakup has just proven you right. You had information about past relationships with their partners and warned them to stay away to avoid heartbreak, but all fell on deaf ears. Now what you predicted is just what has happened. So, while your friend cries over the breakup, you feel so good that you have been vindicated and it is the right time to say, “I told you so.”
10. You always feel People Date for other Reasons than Love
As skeptical as you are, you develop the notion that people go into relationships for ulterior motives and not love. You always feel that there is nothing like being genuinely in love. Also, you believe people choose their partner based on looks, money, fame, power, etc. You may even think they are in the relationship because they feel lonely and therefore need the company of others to feel ok.
Cynical about Love: Summary
Now, I believe you can relate to some of the above points and that tells you that you are cynical about love. But the good side is, you can change these views by thinking positively. Yes, there will always be a breakup of a relationship. Nonetheless, remember there is light at the end of the tunnel.