Differences Between Dating A Widow and Dating A Divorcee
In the dating world, some men consider a widowed woman equal to a divorced one. They only see the fact that the woman is single and most probably ready to mingle. However, they don’t see the reason behind the single status. However, dating a widow can be quite different from dating a divorcee.
The primary difference is a widow may have lost her spouse when the two were happily married. While a divorcee got separated from her husband because their marriage was not working out. Both the situations are as different as chalk and cheese and needs to be handled likewise. Listed below are a few differences you must keep in mind while dating a widow or a divorcee.
A widow presumably had a happy marriage before their partner died all of a sudden. On the contrary, a divorced woman will have terminated her marriage because she and her partner were no longer interested in staying with each other as a couple.
A divorce is a failed marriage involving an unhappy couple, but that is not the case with a widow. Though both the parties may be grief-stricken, coming out of the grief can be more difficult for the widow. She may even love her late husband more after his death. Dating after the passing of a spouse is harder than dating after divorce.
If kids are involved, a widow has to bear the complete responsibility of parenting them single-handedly. In cases of divorced moms, they may have their ex-husband to help with the parenting matters. They may have shared custody of their kids. Hence their ex-husband will continue to be a part of your date’s life always.
If you are dating a widow, you will have to make extra efforts to share the responsibility of parenting as well and try and form a bond with their kids too. This will ensure that your date gets some time to spend with you too and not remain busy with the kids all the time. For divorced moms, they can sometimes take a break from parenting if their ex-spouse is also helping in raising the children.
3. Financial Support
Divorcees may have better financial support than a widow. They may be receiving alimony from their ex-husband or financial support for raising the children. On the other hand, widowed women may have no such financial support. They may have to start their life from scratch.
4. Future Relationships
Widowed women can bring in more empathy and compassion in their relationships as their previous relationship has had a tragic end. They may value their partner more. On the other hand, divorcees may have been through a traumatic relationship, and they may even develop hatred towards love and relationships.
Both the widow and divorcee will have different types of fears to deal with. A divorcee may suffer from ‘commitment phobia’ owing to her past experiences. She may feel insecure and have very low self-esteem. While dating a divorcee, insecurities may become a stumbling block in your relationship. Whereas while dating a widow, it might be her guilt that may cause problems in your new relationship.
A widow may feel reluctant to enter into a new relationship after the death of her spouse as she may believe that by dating another man she is disloyal to her deceased husband. However, a divorced woman may be able to get into another relationship sooner than a widow.
In case of dating a divorcee, their ex-husbands can make you feel jealous or insecure. The ex-factor is more prominent while dating a divorcee. You may fear that your partner will go back to her ex-husband if she feels that she should give one more chance to her relationship or if she doesn’t feel happy with you.
A widow does not have such an option of going back to her spouse. But living up to the expectations of a widow can be hard for you as they may idealize their deceased husbands to be the epitome of love and partnership. In either case, this won’t pose a major problem if you and your partner understand that every love and relationship is different. Then handle the nuances in a matured way.
A woman dating after the death of her spouse have to face more backlashes as there is more stigma associated with it. Divorced women have a better standing in the society when it comes to dating again.
A divorced woman finding love again after a broken marriage finds acceptance by a wider section of the society than a widowed woman. If you’re dating a widow, you must be aware of such stigmas and not let your partner feel discouraged or bothered by such negative criticism.
The end of marriage will always be a harrowing experience irrespective of whether it’s due to divorce or due to the death of a spouse. When venturing into the dating arena, you must learn to handle both the situations as per the need of the hour.
A sensitive and open outlook can help you understand the differences better and deal with them likewise. The one thing you must always remember is – Never Assume. It is not necessary that a widow will have had a successful and happy marriage. It is easy to assume that the life of a widow may have been more challenging than that of a divorced woman. But that is not the case. People change, and so do circumstances.
It is important to remember that assumptions always come with blind spots. Making the wrong assumptions causes pain and suffering for everyone. For having a successful relationship with a widow or a divorcee, the most crucial thing to take into account is their history. Get knowledge of the situations they have been through. Also what kind of effect their past experiences have had on them.