15 Great First Date Questions
Dates can be uncomfortable, especially for those who are extremely shy and nervous about meeting new people. And, what makes it even more nerve-wracking is the fact that both people are hoping to find the other attractive, have a good time, and maybe even see each other again. Often people can find a date, but when it comes, they don’t know what to say or don’t know how to get the conversation going and KEEP it going. But, here is a list of first date questions that can be used.
The key on a first date is to appear comfortable, but it’s also to help make the other person feel comfortable during the occasion. Each person wants the vibe to be calm and relaxed and fun. Also, the whole point of first dates (usually) is to get to know one another by acting interested but also not overbearing with too many questions.
And lastly, it’s important to make both people feel comfortable and enjoy the time by keeping the conversation going. That is a big problem on dates. They start off well, but eventually the conversation peters out, and people don’t know what to do! These questions can help to fix this common problem. These first questions are a bit “small-talk” ish, but they can open the doors to further conversation.
#1. “Where did you grow up?”
This is personal yet not prying. People ask each other this question all the time. It can open doors to other conversation that relates to where both people grew up and went to school, etc.
#2. “What do you do?”
Again, this is a ubiquitous question which shows interest in the other party while not being overly personal.
#3. “Where did you go to school?”
This question opens the door for both people to talk about where they went to school and their school experience.
#4. “What did you study?”
Again, this gets both people to share what they’ve studied and what their passions are.
#5. “Where do you live currently? How do you like it there?”
Try not to make this sound creepy, but when both parties are meeting on a date, it’s safe to say they live in the same area. So, it’s a typical question to ask what part of the city or the town each person lives in.
#6. “How many family members do you have?”
Now that the introductory questions are out of the way, hopefully, a few drinks have been drunk or at least brought to the table, and the uneasy nerves have worn off. Here are a few questions that can be asked further on the date when both people are feeling at least a bit more comfortable.
#7. “How did you know you wanted to do what you do?”
This digs a little deeper into the other person’s life. The questioner can learn a bit more about their dating partner and understand them better.
#8. “Do you like animals? Do you have any pets?”
#9. “What is your biggest pet peeve?”
This is always a good thing to know about a person, and it can show what they’re truly like and if the people will be a good match or not.
#10. “What are your co-workers like?
Do you hang out with them outside of work?” This is an inoffensive question that not only gets the other person talking, but it gives the inquirer a bit of insight into their social life. Are they loners, or do they get along well with people, and do they have friends to hang out with in their own time?
#11. “Where have you traveled?
Do you hope to travel often in the future?” For this generation, travel is becoming a part of their lives. Someone who has never traveled is becoming less and less unknown in the world. It’s also a window into someone’s life when they share where they’ve visited in the past or where they want to travel in the future. And then each person can share their travel stories or their travel dreams.
#12. “Do you play any sports?”
Again, this is an example of an inoffensive question that lets the other person know what their lifestyle is. Are they healthy and enjoy fitness or not?
#13. “What do you like doing when you’re not at work or out on dates?”
This question is a great one to spur on the conversation but to also see what the person’s interests are, and the questioner can see if any of their interests match. Perhaps a second date will be in the works.
#14. “Are you a book or a movie person?”
Not that someone can’t be both, but an avid reader probably won’t want to be in a full-time relationship with someone who never reads or doesn’t like to read. So, this is a good thing to inquire about.
#15. “What’s on your bucket list?”
It is always exciting and popular to ask on a first date. It gets everyone comfortable, and each person can share their ideas and dreams for the future and want they want to accomplish. It lets both parties learn interesting things about the other.
Now, no date should simply be a 2 hour interrogation time. That would make at least one of the parties uncomfortable, and a second date will most likely not occur. It also doesn’t create a vibe of comfort, ease, and fun which is what dates are supposed to be! Each person wants to come out of the experience having had a good time, even if they aren’t interested in a long-term relationship with the other person.
On a date, not all of these questions need be used, and they don’t need to be asked in any specific order. These are simply a few ideas to get the date started, and usually, it will go from there. If at least one person is a skilled conversationalist, they can branch off from one question and go into other topics, encouraging the other person to come along with them. Go with the flow of conversation on a date.
Don’t feel stuck and settle on one topic or only ask certain questions. Try not to get too personal because that can scare people off a bit, but don’t be too impersonal or robotic either. Show the person that interest is there, even if the individual is a little jumpy or edgy.
Also, use these questions if the conversation has started to lag towards the end of the date, and it isn’t time yet to go! Keep the conversation going with the above questions, and things will smooth out, and maybe new topics will pop up to assist the interaction further.
Keep this in mind: the purpose of dates is to have fun, meet someone new, and enjoy their company. Don’t put any pressure on the date or it will be a tense vibe that the other person won’t be running back to experience again. Nerves are normal, but try to keep things light and cheery and pleasant to avoid any awkwardness or discomfort. Almost everyone feels uncomfortable on dates, but these questions will help steer the dating partners in the right conversational direction! Good luck!