10 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage
Courting each other is always the most exciting part of any relationship. However, it is not surprising that challenges begin to unveil when partners decide to settle down together and get married. Tying the knot means that you would have to understand your partner through thick and thin. Whether they have specific weaknesses or strengths, you just have to compromise and understand each other.
There are certain lies that you might think they would not damage your marriage, but in the end, you would live to regret. This critique takes a closer look at some of the terrible lies that you should not let into your head, settle down together and get married. Tying the knot means that you would have to understand your partner through thick and thin. Whether they have certain weaknesses or strengths, you simply have to compromise and understand each other.
1. When Love Fades, You Should Divorce
One thing that you should understand with marriage is that it is a long-term covenant with your partner and with God. This means that there are numerous trials and tribulations along the way. At some point, you might gain the feeling that you no longer love your partner anymore.
So, does this mean that you should jump into divorcing right away? Definitely not! In fact, this is the last option that you should have in mind. It is important for marriage partners to keep in mind that there are therapies which aim to help them in reviving the love that they once had for each other. Therefore, before you think of divorce, find a way of saving your marriage by seeking professional help.
2. Your Huge Mistake Is Unforgivable
So, your lover caught you cheating on their back, and you have the impression that this mistake is unforgivable. Well, if your partner is compromising enough and willing to make things work, this should not be a reason to terminate your relationship. Therefore, refrain from the mentality that any big mistakes in your relationship would ruin the marriage that you have. Stick close to each other in times of need. Such trying moments define the strength of your marriage.
3. Divorcing Each Other Will Not Affect Your Children
Perhaps you have been convincing yourself that your teenage children would not be affected by your separation. Well, the truth of the matter is that they would be negatively affected. Once you divorce your wife or husband, your children would gain a negative perception of love and marriage. They would acquire the mentality that love hurts and that it does not work. Therefore, before you convince yourself of an idea that would ruin your marriage completely, try to make things work with your partner.
4. You Are Different From Each Other
Complaining about the differences that are existent in your love affair is the last thing that you should be doing. Ask yourself why you got married the first time. Maybe this will remind you of the reasons why you fell in love with your spouse. It is important to note that it is your differences that would pull you closer to each other. Not the other way round. The only thing required from both partners is that they should learn to compromise and meet in the middle. When things seem too weighty on both of you, seek professional assistance.
5. Your Marriage Lacks Hope
There is also a scenario where you tend to think that your marriage is beyond solving. This happens when lovers have tried everything and yet nothing seems to work. This mentality will only bring negativity in your relationship. When this happens, you simply cannot wait to sign the divorce papers and get over the relationship. Nevertheless, you should keep in mind that out there lies nothing better than what you had. For that reason, always try your level best to fix the small mistakes that seem to put you at loggerheads with your lover.
6. Your Happiness Comes First
Another lie that will possibly destroy your marriage is claiming that your happiness comes from anything else. Undeniably, this sounds selfish. This only means that you only think of yourself and not your partner. Successful marriage relationships are filled with compromise. There are certain things that you might want to do simply to make your partner happy. Consequently, the best manner of thinking would be making your partner happy and not yourself.
7. Your Partner Does Not Make You Happy
Another factor related to the above is having in mind the idea that your lover does not make you happy. If you are keen enough, you will notice that this, in a way puts the entire burden of making you happy to your lover. This is not a good thing. The worst happens as your partner is under a lot of pressure to meet the huge demands you have set for them. Similarly, the environment created here is that your spouse would not feel at ease to express their sincerest form of love. So, watch out!
8. Starting Over With Someone Else Is What You Need
A huge mistake that lovers make is getting into new relationships with the hopes of gaining a new form of happiness that they lacked in their former marriage. Well, the truth of the matter is that this rarely works. When one enters into a new relationship, there is a high chance that they would be taking their huge burden to their new love affairs. This infers that the chances of your next marriage working are close to nil. First, get your marriage on track and see whether there are hurdles that need professional help. Therefore, this is the only way that you would rest guaranteed you are making the right decisions.
9. You Married Your Spouse, Not Their Family
There are numerous marriages that get destroyed over in-laws issues. In as much as this might sound to be a common thing, it is important to take it seriously. The fact that you married your partner means that you also brought yourself closer to his or her friends and family. This is a fact that you need to be in terms with. Find a way of loving his family as they also grow to love you. If this proves difficult, just play it cool without having to fight over such issues. There is a high chance that you would be interacting with your in-laws more often. As a result, you have to cope.
10. Good Marriages Embrace Traditional Norms
We live in an environment where traditions might have been washed into the drains when it comes to marriage issues. If you are expecting to marry a homely wife, there is a small chance you will be getting the right partner. Women have grown to love their independence and freedom. Therefore, get married with the mentality that you will be happy regardless of the roles you would be taking at home. Do not raise your head up high and claim that things must be done as you say. Ensure that you do not mistake what submission means in this generation that we are living in.
To sum it up, from the look of things, the discussed issues are minor things that we go through in our daily lives. They become weighty as lovers lack ways of effectively dealing with them. Ultimately, they only think that divorcing would help rescue their marriage. This is not true. Always stick close to each other and seek for marriage counseling whenever possible.