How To Attract The Right Person
In my experience, no one gets tired of getting a fine-tuned, intense moment of clarity when it comes to matters of the heart. Trust me, dating nowadays is tough enough; with needs to get connected to the other person, emotional gears and sometimes that weirdness of halting your beliefs and prospects rather abruptly.
Now, don’t get me wrong. Keeping things in check, dealing with trust and marking out red signals are few of your worries. You should know and do these for and on yourself;
- First impressions do not define anyone entirely.
- Dwelling on the past may not allow a better chance in the future.
- Learn from your experiences and please, do move on.
- Listen, hear what other people say; don’t be too quick to talk first.
- Do the self-love, self-care, self-appreciation thing
This is your duty. No, it’s a responsibility. You owe yourself that much and so much more. If you don’t love yourself to a fault that it’s almost selfish, it becomes difficult to notice attraction from others. Although, not all of those can turn out to be genuine. Having that warm cocoon will help build confidence and a happier relationship.
This 3 in 1 package starts from actually staying positive, balancing fun and work as well becoming the best version of yourself without doing things you don’t like. If you want a flat tummy and you know deep down it will make you happier, just go for it. Focus on the good in you as you tidy up the darker lane. No one can make you happy if you are not happy inside.
Ways To Finding The Right Person
1. Express Yourself
Expression is essential especially when made clear and uncomplicated. While some people like to call, others like their ‘alone time’ and some may text all day with ease. It, therefore, becomes necessary to communicate your preference. Be as open as you can be. Don’t assume the other person will read signals or must know how to deal with some situations. Guiding them is okay. For example, girls like words of love and appreciation. Their duties are to tell their partners how they should go by it. Make suggestions and appreciate him when he shares his own as well.
2. Stop Looking Frantically
Yes! Stop looking for the right one everywhere you go. I remember when I was younger, I had this long list of qualities I felt the right one should have. I didn’t even start dating until much later when I realized my priorities shifted from the primary things.
I mean, focus on things you enjoy, your talent, family and friends and even your career. Start working on being the right person! Quit walking in circles while wondering when the right person will come. Fashion yourself into that image you admire so much, learn new things.
When your focus is set, it readily prepares you as a balanced individual when your special one comes along. Regardless of how or when you met a person, it takes a while to understand their personality, character, strengths, and flaws.
3. Know What You’re Looking For
It is only healthy to have your values right. Look for care rather than beauty, humor instead of wittiness, curiously intelligent people, a person with similar values and social background as yours. Ask yourself, what you want really. Do I just need a temporary fix? Am I just after physical attractiveness or do I need to prove that I can also find a man or woman?
Be honest and true; search deep down. Talk to your friends and family. Ask for tips, evaluate yourself through them and don’t be insulted by their feedbacks, they probably know you better than anyone else. Choose with no pressure, however, what you do today affects tomorrow.
4. Cut Him/Her Some Slack
No one is going to have all you dreamed of because no one is perfect. In fact, you are not either. Expect to see flaws and remember you have yours too. Often, I appreciate imperfection because it reminds us of human frailty but helps us grow. Look beyond attractiveness and ability. Patiently let them grow while exploring different options. Getting hurt is not always fun and sometimes cannot be avoided. Just make the best of all happenings.
5. Build A Connection
Naturally, you’ll come across people whose personality makes you nervous and self-conscious. You can do these to overcome your fear and build a great connection;
Concentrate on the outside. Instead of succumbing to your thoughts, be present in that moment. Live in it. Communicate and pay attention to what is going on around you.
Be curious; show your undivided interest. Being curious about someone will help you know more about them… it shows and they, in turn, will like you for it. They will want to meet more often while building attraction and interest. Be respectful. Put the devices away when conversing. You can’t truly, entirely pay attention to someone doing other stuff. Non-verbal communication- the tone of your voice, bodily reaction count for something. If reflects your response and perception. Don’t be rude.
6. Deal With Mistrust
Trust is the foundational and fundamental basis of any relationship at all. When trust is absent, feeling cared for is absent too. True, you might have been betrayed, traumatized or even abused in the past. It is quite understandable that you want people locked out of your trust zone for fear of vulnerability. It is possible however to learn how to trust again. You could see a therapist, attend a lecture or learn to forgive and let go of past events.
When one can’t trust people especially in a relationship, the partner will probably suffer for someone else’s crime. Such relationship itself will never last. It dampens self- esteem thereby creating a wider gap.
Dealing with mistrust should entail working with a therapist you feel very comfortable with. Not giving room for discouragement and gradually learning how to trust again. It is imperative also to bare it all. Don’t keep more skeletons in the cupboard.